taking life one minute at a time

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow,

for tomorrow will worry about itself.

Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Matthew 6:34

Hey guys!! I hope you all are doing amazing. My immune system that is about as weak as a thin piece of glass has failed me once again, and I have a cold. Other than that, I have been feeling great. My mental health has been great this past week. 

Today's topic is something that has been on my mind for awhile. I am so excited to talk about this specific topic, not only because it is just something everyone needs to be reminded of, but because I find it to be one of my biggest coping mechanisms regarding my anxiety. 

Whether you have anxiety or not, it is easy to wonder about our future. We think about the test that is on Tuesday, the math homework we don't know how to do that is due tomorrow, or the massive project due in a month. We think about that project we have to get done by the end of the week, the coworker we don't want to see tomorrow at work, or maybe not feeling so secure with your current job. Whatever it is, we think about it. A lot of times, we dread it. Someone like me, who struggles with anxiety, it is easy to worry about the smallest things. Sometimes, it's worries about  tomorrow, and sometimes, it is worries about what could happen in the next hour. 

There is always something on my mind these days. As the days go on, I feel like I can't even hold a conversation at times, because my mind is always elsewhere. My thoughts are so disorganized, and slowly but surely, I start panicking. I am constantly thinking, "What will I post next? I need more pictures for my Instagram, my blog, etc. What if people think _______? Will people think I am being annoying? God, am I saying the right things?" I loveeeee what I do. I REALLY do. I love writing and creating various forms of content, but just like most things, my mind will always be my biggest judge. I will continue to say this, but I will always be my biggest hater and supporter. I will judge before I post, and pat myself on the back before anyone else can when I do post. I cannot wait for the day that my blog gets thousands of views, my social medias pull in more people, and I feel like the hours I put in are paying off more and more. I am so happy with the few people who do talk to me. I am thankful for those who have told me their stories. I am thankful for those who encourage me. This is not about me not being thankful, but about me, hoping I can reach more people. My dream would be to talk to hundreds of people, and make this kind of thing a career.

Wow, just wow. (Not my house)

Here is the thing though. I cannot see tomorrow. As much as I would like to see if all this time will pay off the way I want it to, I cannot. But you know what I can control? I can control the very minute I am in. I can pray that my time pays off the way God wants it to. I can pray that I glorify God with every minute I am given. I am not promised the next minute... let alone the next day. I am not perfect. I will mess up. I will have moments of complete fear. But if I can make it through this minute I am in right now, I can make it through the next minute I am given. 

Let's take your life for example. What are you doing in this exact minute? You are reading my blog. (I pray to God that He is able to speak through me to each of You in whatever way you are needing right at this moment.) As I bring up my worries about tomorrow, you may be thinking of yours. Guess what? Just like me, you are not promised the next minute. You are only given the minute you are living in right now. As scary as it sounds, you may not make it to the minute you are so scared of. Yet, you spent some of your last minutes scared of what is to come. If we greet each worry with, "Hey, I do not know if I will make it to then. Technically, anything can happen to me before then. Instead, I am going to use this minute I am in now to be happy, and thankful for everything I do know (everything that has happened in the past to get you to the very point you are in now)." Imagine, if we did that. How much better and carefree would our lives be? This is not saying "Hey, I will die before my test on Tuesday... Better not study." Instead this is saying, "Hey, I do not know what my next minute will be, but right now, I am alive and thankful. I will study for the test, and prepare for it. I can control my right now, but I cannot control anything else."

How cool is that God does know our next minute? We are not in control of it, but God is. God does not make accidents. Everything He does is for our own good. This verse says it all :
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'Plans prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11 
Telling myself repeatedly to take my life a minute at a time, and to be content with what I know has completely flipped my mindset. I take comfort in knowing that my hardest times will pass. And that for all I know, my next minute could be my very best. Challenge the way you approach things that make you feel uncertain. You are not promised the next minute. You are only promised right now. So, enjoy it to the very best of your abilities. 

This pic was taken shortly after Bo got a haircut. He seems very concerned about his appearance hahaha

Last but not least... you ALL are soooo loved and appreciated! <3 <3 Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Also, please keep praying for my grandmother (heart failure + other health complications) and my cousin (recovery from brain tumor removal). 

Let's talk! I love hearing your own stories and opinions! If you have any questions / comments / concerns that you would rather not comment down below, direct message me or email me!

Instagram : Newkindofliving

Email : Newkindofliving@gmail.com   

PEACE OUT UNTIL NEXT TIME!!!

what my life is really like

"Be joyful in hope,

pray continually, 

give thanks in all circumstances;

for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

Romans 12:12

Hey guys!! I hope you all are doing amazing. If you have not read "my anxiety is a blessing", please do that to get filled in on my THREE latest announcements (since these things will be discussed in today's blog lol). It is also a blog I worked hard on like I do every single one haha. But don't forget to come back to this one afterwards! 

(I needed to share this photo of my sister's boyfriend's green pumpkin. He insisted on getting a pumpkin of every color at the pumpkin patch (green, white, orange, and yellow). I like the basic orange pumpkins. Does anyone like different colored pumpkins more?)

Let's jump right in to today's topic. As many of you know, I am a full-time nanny. I work from 8am-4pm Monday-Friday. I went from working about twenty-four hours to forty hours a week. A couple weeks ago, I reached one year of working for the same family. The almost three year old was a month away from turning two when I started working. The mom was still pregnant with their now 8 month old baby boy. This past year was full of many transitions and changes. I have genuinely enjoyed every single moment. I have dealt with many tantrums, and shared many laughs with the boys. I would never trade this past year for anything. 

The question a lot of people have almost asked or were actually brave enough to ask is... How much do I make as a nanny? I have no problem with talking about my pay. I could be nannying for many more years, or be doing something completely different. Anyways, I was making thirteen dollars an hour when I had just one boy and fifteen dollars an hours with both boys. My pay has since been raised to fifteen dollars an hour with one child and seventeen dollars with both boys with the exception that I do a couple more chores around the house. I am very thankful for not only the little ones, but their parents who have always been nothing but kind / great to work for. 

(Screenshot from a clip that will be in Monday's YouTube video. You guys already know my obsession with taking pictures while I am in the car. This time I played it extra safe and was not driving haha.)

Working forty hours a week obviously takes up a big chunk of time lol. As I push myself to do what I can to grow "New kind of Living"'s community, I find myself growing increasingly more busy by the day. Time management and agendas have become my best friend. These blogs that I am now writing every week can take awhile. Not only do I have to write it, I edit them myself, and I am sure that is very evident by the grammar mistakes I make haha. I take the pictures for my blog, and try to find the right quotes. I also have to have pictures for my Instagram and Twitter most weeks. I laugh about it often, because there is really nothing I do these days that isn't documented in some way.

On top of nannying and social media, I workout four - five times a week. I watch a YouTube video and follow along. It is only fifteen minutes, but it is enough to make me sweat and get my heart to race. I am pretty small in width, and have no desire to lose weight. Not only do I just workout for fun, I also read a book a week just because. I will talk more about that in a different blog. Soon, I will tell you all the other project I am working on, and then, you will see even more why I am so busy. These past couple of months have gone from too much free time to almost none. I am learning everyday to find more time. My current goal is start waking up at 5 or 5:30 every morning to give me time before work to accomplish tasks. This past week I woke up everyday at 6am to workout, take a shower, and read some of the book I was reading for the week. I am easing myself into it haha.

(Another sunrise photo that I took from my backyard this past week. Also, I am trying a new way of editing. No more little polaroid-looking edits for now. I like it. If you do not, tell me. Time will tell how long this edit will stay around.)

My life is all over the place, but the more I have to get done the more I come to love what I do even MORE. Yes, I have days where I am discouraged. I have little moments where I think to myself, "What if all my time and efforts are for nothing? What if I fail?" It's not all La La Land over here, but I am beginning to feel joy that I have never experienced before. I never knew how multi-passionate I was until only a few months ago. There is times I am on my way home from work about to explode, because I am so excited to run inside my house and work on everything. I have a hard time falling asleep most nights (which is new... despite anxiety I have always been a good sleeper), because my mind is spinning with ideas. I was so nervous about leaving my comfort zone, and going head on into doing literally everything I can think of to grow "New kind of Living". Now, I never want to go back. Sure, my following is small and slow growing, but each day, I find myself loving this kind of work more. I LOVE being a nanny, and I LOVE being a blogger. 

See, why I preach so hard about getting the heck out of your comfort zone?? I have always loved and lived my life to the best of my abilities, but now, I feel like life is just starting. Whatever is stopping you today... IGNORE it. Be passionate. Make goals. Follow all your dreams. My biggest tip is pray through every moment. Moments of discouragement ... PRAY. Moments of accomplishment ... PRAY. Anger ... PRAY. Confusion ... PRAY. Moments of joy... PRAY. My relationship with God has never been this strong and this rewarding. It took time, and many nights of anger and confusion (sometimes even crying) to get to the joy I feel today. You can do this! 

(You all are missing out on not following me on twitter to keep up with my fall bucket list hahaha. Hurry over there to be my first follower LOL.)

Last but not least... you ALL are soooo loved and appreciated! <3 <3 Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Also, please keep praying for my grandmother (heart failure + other health complications) and my cousin (recovery from a brain tumor removal). 

Let's talk! I love hearing your own stories and opinions! If you have any questions / comments / concerns that you would rather not comment down below, direct message me or email me!

Instagram : Newkindofliving

Email : Newkindofliving@gmail.com  

Twitter : Newkindofliving

PEACE OUT UNTIL NEXT TIME!!!

my anxiety is a blessing

"Rejoice always,

pray continually,

give thanks in all circumstances,

for this God's will for you

in Christ Jesus.

Do not quench the Spirit."

1 Thessalonians 5:16-19

Hey guys!! I hope you all are doing amazingggg! I am soooo happy, because today, I actually have THREE exciting things to share with you guys. Number 1 : I will be posting weekly now! Every Saturday at 10am, there will be a new blog post. Whenever people asked me why I don't write more, I'd always tell them that I don't have any time to spare, and I still don't haha! But I am continually pushing my limits, and if time is one of them, I will find more. Number 2 : I have a twitter now! She is a work in progress... I have literally zero followers haha. My twitter account is a lot different from my other "New kind of Living" stuff. My plan with it right now is to use it as a way of "documenting" my own little bucket list for each season. I am trying to enjoy life to the fullest. By planning things for each season, I feel like I am able to enjoy each one to its full potential. Sounds corny... I know. Right now, New kind of Living is all about experimentation, and learning to love life a little harder. So, definitely follow me on there @newkindofliving to not miss out on the things I consider bucket list worthy lol.

(I could not think of a better way to start this blog off than with this picture of Bo "screaming".)

Alright, that was a longggg intro! Let's start talking about today's topic. I consider myself a positive person, but I also consider myself the "queen of holding an umbrella over my head on sunny days". So, what am I? The simple answer is... I am both. Since the age of four, my days have been spent trying to get through them with my mind nagging at me about something. 

I have been doing a lot more research on anxiety, and listening to other people's stories. (For the one big project, I have not talked about yet, and also to learn more for my blogs.) It is very easy for me to listen to people talk about how they only had anxiety for two years and conquered it or people who have only just recently started showing symptoms... and think to myself, "I have had it all my life... Why is mine not going away?" However, I do not. I sit there with goosebumps all over my arms, and listen to their stories of how they completely got rid of it. I listen to people who have just recently started showing symptoms, and I feel bad for them. I know how hard it is. I have been there. I am not saying this to seem like an amazing, perfect person. I am saying it to show that pitying myself constantly would do more harm than good, and I would not be able to help anyone. I would be giving up a perfect opportunity to care for those around me, and talk about how good God is when it comes to dealing with any mental illness / hardship . 

There are a lot of people who freak out when they are labelled with anxiety. They think it's this awful lifelong illness that will keep them from enjoying life. No one wants anxiety, but a HUGE percentage of the American population suffers from it. I have talked to many people who think anxiety is the worst possible thing to have. I will agree all day that it is not fun. But I can't agree with it being the worst thing. If I were to agree with them 100%, I would also be agreeing that my whole life has been the worst life to have. Most people are diagnosed / show symptoms when they older, and so, they know what it is like to feel "normal". Since I have had anxiety since the age of four, I don't know any different, and for that, I am thankful. 

("Anxiety I will transform you into something useful and productive. I will not bow down to you." Jaeda Dewalt ... This is the view I get to see every single day on my way to work. There is a lot of things that make me thankful for my job, but I am reminded daily of this specific little blessing... a view that's pretty even on the most cloudy days. [I was driving incredibly slow. There was no one around except a van up ahead of me. I took this pic in less than 30 seconds. I don't ever recommend or encourage anyone to use their phone at all while driving. So, do NOT do what I did lol. Stay safe on the roads, friends!])

In eighth grade (my last year of being homeschooled and my hardest year ever), I refused to leave my house and even my room for three MONTHS. I lost fifteen pounds despite being already very underweight. A lot of that time is a blur. I did schoolwork as quickly as I could, and then, I would lay in bed. There are three times I remember the most. One time, my dad told me I had to leave my room to watch a movie in the living room with my family. I freaked out and cried a lot. The second one is my family wanted to go eat pizza at a park. I cried getting into the car, and yelled at my parents for making me go. The third time my parents took my whole family to see a movie at the theater. I spent most of the movie sitting right outside on one of the benches, and scared out of my mind for no reason. I remember my dad walking in and out of the theater trying to talk to me, and help me. I was to freaked out to be helped.

After that, I said to myself, "Okay, we cannot get to that LOW of a point again." It is important for you to see my low points. ("addressing my mental illness" has more stories from my childhood.) I need to show you that my anxiety was not a piece of cake. It was not just school that freaked me out. I cried going to friends' houses, Sunday school, and at one point, I even cried going to the movie theater with my family. So, you see why I cannot agree with people who act as if anxiety is the world's biggest curse? I have story after story of anxiety making my life hard, but if I agree with what people say, I would be saying a whole lot about the way I look at my life. 

("I'm thankful for my struggle because without it, I wouldn't have stumbled across my strengths." Unknown ... Yes, another picture of Bo, but look at him. This was moments before he went to go get a haircut. Look at how happy he looks.)

Anxiety is very, very hard to deal with at times. Yes. However, there are far worse things to deal with. Anxiety comes with many blessings. When I make baby steps, I am extremely proud of myself.  When I look back on my life, I don't always see myself crying and holding on to my mom. I see myself laughing. I see myself having fun, and all the friends I had through the years. If you ask me about my anxiety, I will tell you my little summary, add that I am thankful for it, and then tell you how I believe that it has helped me talk about God / help others. I have had that exact conversation with many people, and every time, I say I am thankful I mean it more and more. Because once again, I was given the chance to tell someone that anxiety is not the worst thing in the world. And I got the chance to talk about how God has gotten me through each day... the good, the bad, and the ugly ones. 

It is all about mindset. I have extremely hard days. I have not so good days. But you know what?? It makes me enjoy my good days just a little bit more. My days are constantly going up and down. If you read my daily journal, I would not blame you if you laughed. One day, I am all excited and happy to just be breathing, and the next, I am like "ughhh, why me?" If you struggle with a mental illness or anything similar, you are given an option. You can decide if it defines you, or you can decide if it is a part of you. Everyone deals with something. You can boo hoo all day, or you can learn to just live life with a few bumps in the road.

Last but not least... you ALL are soooo loved and appreciated! <3 <3 Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Also, please keep praying for my grandmother (heart failure + other health complications) and my cousin (recovery from a brain tumor removal). 

Let's talk! I love hearing your own stories and opinions! If you have any questions / comments / concerns that you would rather not comment down below, direct message me or email me!

Instagram : Newkindofliving

Email : Newkindofliving@gmail.com   

Twitter : Newkindofliving

PEACE OUT UNTIL NEXT TIME!!!

sheltered

"Children, 

obey your parents in everything, 

for this pleases the Lord."

Colossians 3:20

Hey guys!! I hope you are all doing well. I have been soooo busy lately, and I actually love it a lot more than I thought I would. I cannot wait to show you all everything I have been working on. Hopefully, in the next blog, I will be able to share TWO exciting new things. The biggest project will still remain a secret for a little while longer!

Today's topic is another blast from my past lol. I have mentioned a few times that I was homeschooled from 4th through 8th grade with my sister, Anastasia. However, I have not gone into any real detail of what that was like. It is also important to note that I come from a very religious family. I want to talk about what it was like from being "sheltered" to having to go to high school, and seeing the "real" world. I also want to answer a question... Just how sheltered was I?

I want to make it clear that I think the way my parents raised me was great. My parents are not perfect, but no parent/s are. So, I am not saying that either. I am thankful for everything they taught me, and it did not feel like I was living in a prison or anything haha. For the few people who once tried to claim that my family was in cult, I was / am not, and I am here to say exactly what my childhood was like. (Although, I do find that a hilarious claim, and whenever, I think about it I always laugh. I have no idea what exactly was said or done to lead them to draw that conclusion.) I also am writing this blog to show that growing up in what many would consider a very religious household is not what most people would think (specifically from different backgrounds). It's also an excuse to talk about my childhood which I always enjoy haha. I will also talk about what kind of churches I have gone to, rules I had growing up, and my experience with "culture shock". 

(This was the "word of the week" post on instagram from this past Sunday. So, I am just popping in again to remind everyone to be nice to everyone. We do not always know what they are going through. Challenge yourself to do random acts of kindness this week! You never know who could use it!)

Let's talk about life right before being homeschooled. I am taking it all the way back to when I was just a baby. I went to "mother's morning out" (a couple days a week where I went to a little school for a couple of hours). Then, I went to preschool which was a half day for only a few days a week. Finally K5, my kindergarten class was five days a week but still only half days. For first grade, my parents put me in a Montessori school. They hoped that a more peaceful and hands on environment would be good for me (because my anxiety was getting worse and worse). While I was in third grade, my family began the adoption process (read "adoption - sister's perspective pt 1" and "...pt 2" to hear about that wild ride). When we adopted two girls from Ukraine who did not know any English in 2009, my parents decided that it would be best to try to catch them up by homeschooling them. Since school was so hard on me, they decided that it would be good for me to be homeschooled as well. I was overjoyed with that decision. 

So, there is the reasoning behind me being homeschooled. Now, let's talk about what it was like. My mom taught us, and we were taught to teach ourselves as well. We took tests, had homework, wrote papers, and did everything else that other students had to do. We just did it all at home. We were taught through a christian curriculum. So, books we were assigned to read were usually religion-based. We had to learn about every religion, and we had to learn ALL about evolution. So, I use the term "sheltered" lightly, because my parents wanted us to know about other religions / cultures / views. Homeschooling was great for my circumstances, and my sister, Anastasia, was able to catch up. (My other sister did not stay homeschooled.) It is also important to note that throughout my later elementary / middle school years, I was involved in various sports like basketball, a little soccer, and a little swim team. We also went to various Bible studies. We were definitely NOT at home 24/7 haha. 

As for churches I went to growing up, my family went to a regular Methodist church up until I was five years old. Then, we switched to non-denominational, and have stayed non-denominational to this day. Currently, I go to a little non-denominational church in my neighborhood every Sunday morning. Non-denominational is probably one of the most relaxed denominations out there, but if it had to be compared to another denomination, we are most similar to baptist.   

(This picture was taken from my backyard!! I will never NOT be in awe of how pretty God makes sunrises.)

Going into high school, I knew that not everyone would be like me, and not everyone would have had the same upbringing. There would be different cultures, religions, and views. I was not oblivious to what it would be like at all, but there were other things that did surprise me a little bit at first. Cussing flowed from people's mouths like it was nothing. Vulgar jokes were said almost constantly. I mean... you know how high schoolers are. Looking back, I would say that there were not a whole lot of people like me and Anastasia, but I also would NOT say that I did not fit in. I had no problem adjusting to the way others were (adjusting but not following / doing. [Such as cussing, vaping, etc.]), and I was able to have a ton of fun. The adjustment period was probably no longer than a month (maybe even just a week or two) my freshmen year. 

Now, let's discuss rules that I had growing up. (I am not going to list out every tiny rule I had growing up. I am just going to talk about the important / relevant ones regarding this blog.) The rules I had growing up were basic. Cussing has never been tolerated in my house. My parents do not cuss, and so, we do not. When I was like seven years old, I said "crap" over and over. I was told to leave the room. Other than that lol, I never used words my parents did not like. To this day, I never developed the habit of cussing. We were very encouraged to listen to only Christian music (this lightened up a bit as we grew older). Up until I was about nine, I did not know that there was other music out there haha. There were a ton of movies and shows I was not allowed to watch. Even through part of my sophomore year in high school, there were PG-13 movies I was still not allowed to watch. I was almost 18 when I was allowed to start watching any kind of movies without asking. (I watched any PG-13 movie by then, but I am referring to R-rated ones.) I did not get my first phone until I was a sophomore in high school. (I did go through a couple of iPod touches from the age of 12 till I got my phone). 

(Minutes after I had taken the picture right above, I saw from the window the sky had turned pink. I ran outside, and absolutely had to take another picture. How could I not post both???)

I was allowed to date. I had my first "crush" when I was three years old hahaha. All through elementary and middle school, I would happily announce to my family that I had a "boyfriend". Then, I was in a serious relationship throughout all of high school. My parents were also lenient on curfews. Once I was able to drive, I would stay out till after midnight sometimes with no problems. I had gained so much trust that my parents had no problem with Anastasia and I going to parties in high school.

So although, some may think it is a little extreme to not be able to watch a certain movie at fifteen years old, I really was not that sheltered (especially considering my circumstances... like being homeschooled for five years). I would say I had a very fun childhood. I had friends to hangout with, and had plenty of sleepovers. I don't feel like my parents kept me from having fun. My anxiety definitely kept me from having more fun than my parents ever did. In fact, my parents encouraged me to have fun. They give me pep talks throughout my life on how to get through my anxiety... So that I could go out and have fun. They have always encouraged each of their children to enjoy life. Setting boundaries never stopped the fun. I was taught to hold tightly to my beliefs, and I did everything I could to do just that. I don't feel that much different than I did when I was in homeschooled and "sheltered" (in terms of faith and values). I was able to learn a lot about the ways of other people more than I could have being homeschooled (obviously lol), and I am very, very thankful for that. I am happy that my parents pushed me and Anastasia out of our little bubble at home, and made us go to high school. 

(This was such a gooddddd coffee. It was a cookies and cream (blended aka frap) with almond milk from Moxie Java. This picture was taken on my android, because I forgot to bring my iPhone, but I am pretty proud of the quality considering the phone I used. Coffee is my favorite thing on planet earth. One of my many boards on my Pinterest is dedicated to my love for coffee. You could always check it out (; ) 

Last but not least... you ALL are soooo loved and appreciated! <3 <3 Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Also, please keep praying for my grandmother (heart failure + other health complications) and my cousin (recovery from brain tumor removal). 

Let's talk! I love hearing your own stories and opinions! If you have any questions / comments / concerns that you would rather not comment down below, direct message me or email me!

Instagram : Newkindofliving

Email : Newkindofliving@gmail.com  

PEACE OUT UNTIL NEXT TIME!!!